Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Exercise Challenge..where did we go?

Wow, as a group we walked (well, you guys did..I wasn't much of a contributor last week) approximately 66.5 miles. That's a lot of mileage!!! You have to check out the status to see where we are! I am excited to see where we will be next week. This is a lot of fun for me. I want to thank you guys for participating. It keeps me motivated.

You guys did great with the weight challenge too! What a great first week! For those of you that haven't gotten in on it, you are more than welcome to join. Some friendly competition never hurt anyone :) We only flog you at the end of each week.

Did you guys see the comment left on my blog yesterday?

Hello. I am a university professor who is conducting research on WEIGHT LOSS BLOGGERS AND THE ROLE BLOGGING HAS PLAYED IN THE BLOGGER’S WEIGHT LOSS. As you may be aware, a lot of research has been done over the years on weight loss but very little has been done on blogging and weight loss. I hope you will help me remedy this.I have chosen you as a potential research participant because you have a weight loss blog, have a weight loss goal of 100 pounds or more, and have been blogging for at least three months.If you choose to participate in this study, you will be asked to complete a survey that I will email you. Your answers will be completely confidential and I will use a pseudonym of your choice in the final study.I have an information sheet about the study I would be happy to share with you. Please email me at aldridga@nsuok.edu if you would like to take a look at it.Thank you for your time and best of luck to you on your weight loss journey.Sincerely,Amy Aldridge Sanford, PhDAssistant Professor of Communication StudiesNortheastern State UniversityTahlequah, OK

Hmm...might have to check that out. What will it hurt right?

In other news, I haven't heard from A this morning so I am hoping that's a good sign that he is on a plane somewhere (one that works)!

Monday, September 29, 2008

Weekly Weigh-In, Challenges

I am down 1.2 lbs this week. Yay, for me! I will be updating our weight challenge as I receive updated. The exercise challenge update will be done on Tuesday mornings. Any late comers that submit their weekly results after I have updated will be credited to the following week's results. I am excited! I wonder how far we walked (I should say I wonder how far you guys carried me this week cuz not much physical activity for me).
My bathroom is almost totally complete so I will be showing off those pictures soon.
Despite the weekend being a bit rough with my mom going to the ER and poor A still stuck in Iraq, things are good. A is still there as of this morning. In fact, I have been talking to him all morning. The plane is broke. They have taken his room, his belongings, everything so now he is not only stuck there but he is homeless (in his words). The poor guy is literally going insane. He told me this morning, "they have to get me home, I'm going to start walking around with my #%%# in hand talking to it.....while slightly drooling on myself". I couldn't help, but laugh my ass off at him.

Oh, I went and saw Nights in Rodanthe and I have to tell you it pissed me off. I am not going to tell you about the movie in case you have plans on seeing it. All I can say is that it really pissed me off!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Bleh Weekend...

It's early Sunday morning and I have been anxiously awaiting to hear from A, at least hoping to hear from A. I didn't even know if I would hear from him when he got into the States or not. I checked my email this morning from my phone, while in bed (I know I am pathetic) and there was an email from him. I was so excited, until I opened it. He is still there. He hasn't left! In his email, he says his flight keeps on getting pushed back and is now pushed back to Monday, then he says, it will get pushed back then too. He has given up. His last sentence to me was, "I am so *#%^ depressed". I feel so helpless. As I read this, the tears came (seeing as I am very emotional anyway) not because he isn't home but because I can "see" his pain and I can't do anything for him. I can't say or do anything to help him through his pain. I just want to reach through the computer and wrap my arms around him and never let him go. *frown

I was able to talk to him for a couple of hours on the computer then and help take his mind off of it or at least I hope so. He is due to leave again tomorrow if the flight doesn't get pushed back again. I hope for his sake it doesn't. I don't know how much more he can handle mentally. I worry about him. He told me that one of the girls that was also heading home had a dream that the flight they were scheduled to take crashed so maybe it's a blessing in disguise that it was postponed. Everyone cross their fingers that he gets to come home tomorrow.

Then, yesterday my mother calls me around 7p and tells me that she is in the emergency room. Why? She tells me she has really bad pains in her left side so they are doing CT scans and they suspect the galbladder. I asked her when she went in....get this, 2 p! I asked her why she didn't call me. She didn't want to worry me. *sigh. They did that same thing when she was unconscious with the head injury in the trauma unit at the hospital. Anyway, it turns out that everything is ok. They sent her home with pills. They say it is colitus. Have no idea what causes that or what but I guess she is ok. Phew...

Friday, September 26, 2008

Breaking News

I had a post all figured out for today but it has left my brain completely because there is breaking news!

A is coming home!

I should also mention that I have found our starting point of our "vacation" AKA exercise challenge. You can see our starting point by checking the status link (above the posts).
Did I mention that...
A is coming home!
The bad news is I still probably won't be able to see him for a couple of weeks. He has to go through the whole release from the military, then off to spend time with his family but at least he will be in the same country and same state. Yes, 6pack will be in the same state within the next 48 hours so you ladies in the same state as me...HANDS OFF, HE'S MINE ....hehe.
Might be time to go buy a new outfit :)

Thursday, September 25, 2008

More talk about challenges

The challenge is on. Those that have commented that they want to be involved have been added. I will start the roster for the exercise challenge sometime today, as well. I will also get together our route for our exercise challenge...where we are going. If there are any requests for our trip, please feel free to throw in your requests.

I have really been slacking on the whole Recipe Thursday. I will get my act together soon. Promise :).

The winners of the last challenge should be receiving their winnings sometime this week. They were mailed yesterday, finally! Sorry, it took so long, but I hope you like them!


More Details...

The weight challenge starts, well now and runs through Monday, November 24th, 2008. There is no time limit to sign up. To be part of the challenge, just comment on the blog that you want to participate and your starting weight. What are the rules, you ask? Each week, come back and visit. Leave me a comment with your weekly weigh in. It doesn't necessarily have to be on Monday seeing as not everyone weighs in on Mondays. Near the top of the page, you will find a link to the challenge status with everyone that is participating. Make sure to visit your fellow bloggers for support and motivation. The number one rule... have fun!
Promote the challenge to others.

How it is going to work?

Each week when I receive the weekly weigh-ins, I will update this blog with the percentage of weight lost. We are not using pounds because some have more to lose than others. Percentage of body weight is the key.

What do I get if I win?

You get nothing (insert Gene Wilder's voice from Willie Wonka)..hehe. J/K. You get a pat on the back? You get the admiration of all us other "losers"? You never know there might be a prize waiting at the end. It will be a surprise.

Exercise Challenge

If you want to participate in the exercise challenge, it will be similar to the weight challenge. Each week you will provide me with the number of minutes you exercised during the week. This doesn't necessarily need to be just exercise conducted in the gym, etc. If you were outside weeding your garden for 2 hours, count it! That's exercise! Pressing the remote control button does not count. Use your own good judgement. I would like to see this turn into a friendly competition among us..however, don't overdo it either and cause yourself any injuries. Now, to make it a little more interesting and fun each week I will convert our minutes into miles. We are going on vacation. We are going to walk across the country and at this point we have absolutely no idea where we will be stopping along the way. This could be a lot of fun....so if you would like to get involved and go on our virtual vacation, let me know!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008


The Challenge...

There are two..there is the exercise challenge and there is the weight loss challenge. The weight loss challenge will be like the one I hosted before with the exception of prizes (sorry!). There may be something in it for the first prize winner. Time will tell. Surprises are always fun! Let me tell you something, my scale is going down everyday so I am going to be giving you ladies a run for your money this time :P. So here's the deal. We will start this week, and we will go 8 weeks. Each week, when you weigh in (it doesn't necessarily need to be Mondays) comment on my blog and I will update the stats. I am going to work on some bling, as well. I need to get the creative juices flowing. I need more coffee for that :). So ladies (and gents, if there any) leave me a comment tell me want to join us and let the friendly competition begin!

The exercise challenge will work similar to the weight challenge. Each week comment with the time exercised in minutes. Which one of us really is the gym rat? (I know it's not me...hehe). Each week, I will compile the number of minutes and convert them to miles walked and we are going on a trip. We are starting in Florida seeing as that's where I live. Where do you want to go? Shall we hike to Alaska? Should we try to visit everyone in the challenge? We will take the scenic route and take some pictures along the way. This could be a lot of fun! Want to join? Let me know in the comments!!! It starts now and will last for 8 weeks.


I have been having issues lately. Self worth/esteem issues. Things have been bothering me that wouldn't normally bother me. Last week F and I had a conversation that hasn't left my head. A comment he made to me just slapped me in the face repeatedly and of course, he had absolutely no idea that it did that to me. Last night I emailed him and shared with him my deepest, darkest secrets because above everything else he still is my friend. I explained everything in my screwed up head. I brought up the comment that bothered me and why it bothered me. Anyway to make a long story short, he messaged me last night and it turned into probably one of our best conversations ever. He knows what issues I am dealing with and why I have those issues or at least the theory I have behind those issues. Although our issues are different, they are similar and affect our self worth. He told me last night that I am a beautiful person inside and out and that any man would be lucky to have me, just some are idiots sometimes (he must be referring to himself..hehe). He told me that he just can't seem to let go of me, it's another issue of his. He said he can't love anyone else, until he loves himself and he is working on that. What a cliche'..but he's right. So it was a really good conversation and I think we have actually grown in some ways...not towards getting back together or anything like that..just grown. Hard to explain. Last night I was thinking about these issues that I am having...then I realized this self esteem/self worth crap phase that I am going through..just started. I am not normally like this...it's the medicine!!!

I should be happy...my scale is going down every day. Literally, every day its going down. Today it was 272. yay. A is coming home at some point and he is a sweet, sweet man that has potential. My bathroom is being remodeled. My roommate is gone. F and I are friends. Bills are getting paid, not a whole lot of money leftover but am doing ok so far. Nothing to be upset about, right? So WTF is my problem?

So, I just need to some how keep this in perspective that it's got to be the meds making me feel this way and keep it in check.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Challenge Changes?

You know after my posting yesterday, I got to thinking. I know don't run for cover, it will be ok. I promise nothing will explode. Many of you don't live in the US, so doing a challenge until Thanksgiving doesn't really work for you. So, I am changing the rules. Yes, I can do that because it's my challenge and there are no prizes anyway. I want some feedback before I go any further.

Would you like to do something like we did last time with the biggest loser? Also, include an exercise one? What are your thoughts? I am ok with doing all the tracking but I want people to get involved, challenge each other, friendly competition....talk to me.

In other news...

I woke up to an E-card from A. Can we all just say aww, all together now. :) It was just a card that said "I was just sitting here thinking about you, so here's a virtual kiss". Short and sweet and it made my morning. It's just nice to know that someone is thinking about you. The little things have always mattered most to me. That man just needs to come home so we can see, just see. *sigh.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Thanksgiving Challenge

How about creating your own personal challenge and compete against others for motivation?

Thanksgiving Weight Challenge

Thanksgiving is approximately 8 weeks away. How much do you want to lose by Thanksgiving? Sometimes it helps to write our goals down to make us more accountable, especially if we give our goals to someone else. Friendly competition also seems to help some of us.

Want to participate? Just give me your current weight, the weight you want to be and each week, just comment with your new weight. Let's see how much we can lose!

So, I will start it out...

Thinking thin: 275.2/259

Thanksgiving Exercise Challenge

Want to participate? How much exercise do you plan on doing between now and Thanksgiving? Just give me your goal in minutes and each week give me your total number of minutes of exercise. Let's see if we can get some friendly competition going? Any takers?

So, I will start it out...

Thinking Think 1200 minutes (yikes)
Kate 1600 minutes

My Update

Weighed in at 275.2 today so it was a good week. I ended up losing 2.6. I am stoked! I know I am repeating myself but since I started taking my new thyroid pills and this Topomax I am feeling better and gaining motivation back. The weight is coming off with little to no effort. Now, if I put effort back into it, there is no telling what I can accomplish, at least that's my theory right? Now, that I am starting to get my house into a little bit more order I am going to head back to the gym today. Don't get me wrong the house is still a warzone but it's not nearly as bad. Pictures will be coming soon :).

I haven't talked about A lately but he is still stuck in Iraq and still as sexy as ever. *sigh. They keep giving him dates to come home and then changing him. It is killing him. They told him the other night that he might be able to leave this Friday. Now, it looks like that will change again. For pete's sake, don't tell him anything until the day before. They are literally killing him inside. They are draining the life from him.

F and I still talk. In fact, not this past weekend but the weekend before he had asked me if I wanted to do something on Sunday. I told him sure. He told me he would call me when he got up and we would get together. By 2:30, I didn't hear from him. I texted him and asked if he was alive. He said he got preoccupied with homework and working out. I was pissed. I told him "maybe" we would get together another time. This past Friday we spoke and somehow we got onto the topic of our relationship together and he said "You had to go and fall in love with me and that complicated things" I was taken aback by that statement and actually it hurt. I asked him "so it was all one-sided?". He said no. I told him that he made it more complicated in his head than it really was and that he wouldn't have to worry about me ever falling in love with him again. I am sure he didn't mean it to come out the way I took it but it was a slap in the face to me, a hard one. Despite everything he is a good man with a lot of issues and I am not sure he will ever be ready for a relationship and if he is, it won't be anytime soon. He is not comfortable in his own skin yet. I will still be his friend...but him and I will never be, at least not in the foreseeable future and I am ok with that.

Friday, September 19, 2008

I'm Walking on Sunshine...

It's finally going down...after nine months of struggling. The numbers on the scale are falling! I weighed myself this morning and I weighed 275. Quite honestly, I haven't put much effort into it in the past three weeks either. I have watched what I ate (somewhat) but I have noticed quite a difference in my appetite. It's actually quite strange. I am starving, when I am hungry. Ravenous. I could eat anything. The problem. My eyes are bigger than my stomach. For example, yesterday for lunch I had a BLT, minus the T and french fries. I know, I know. It wasn't exactly healthy. I was full after about 1/2 the BLT. Now, the problem. I continued to eat. I should have stopped. I need to work on that. I think there is this sub-conscious thing about wasting food and/or money. I'm not sure...need to dig deeper. I think I can contribute this new appetite thing to the Topomax. Prior to taking it, I wouldn't have felt full until close to the end of the french fries.

I am noticing in the evening, that I just really don't need a big dinner. I am having a sandwich around 6p and that's it for me, for the evening. I think that my new Synthroid and this Topomax might have just been the answer for me. I wish I would have seen the doctor sooner.

Hopefully, things will calm down a bit next week so I can get back into the gym and things get back to a normal chaotic. There are some classes I want to try out.

I also want to do another challenge. Maybe, both a personal and exercise challenge. I need those to keep myself motivated. Stay tuned for more information. I should have more information on Monday.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

A super quick update

A quick update....it is hectic here.

My house looks like a warzone. My bathroom is totally ripped out. My main bath that I am using right now is a mild warzone. I can use the shower in it, I am brushing my teeth in the kitchen sink and doing my hair in the bedroom.

Work is beyond hectic.

I finally found a yogurt I like..yay!!!! It is WW cheery cheesecake. 1 pt baby!

I am going to try to come and visit some of you today to catch up. I apologize, I have been super busy lately with the house, work and everything in between. I didn't weigh in this week but it looks like things are still going in the direction I need them to be....yay. I think the meds are helping!

Oh, and the BLC winners. I am still waiting on an item or two. I should have them in the next day or so. You should get your winnings by next week sometime!!!

Sorry for the rambling but a quick post!

Friday, September 12, 2008

No Title Today...

I really have absolutely nothing constructive to talk about in regards to healthy living. I haven't gone to any WW meetings yet. It seems they have moved the one that I was going to go to so now I need to find another location with a time that is convenient. Next week. Next week, I also plan to get back to the gym, with or without headache. I am going to muster up my courage and take a class. I really think that if I take a class, I will enjoy it more.

I have really been doing everything half ass the past couple of weeks. It's time to get my ass in gear, my head in the right place and start journaling again. I bought all the right foods at the store. I've been eating them, I just haven't been journaling them. The key is writing down everything.

So, seeing this is the end of another week. This is the end of another half ass week. Monday morning will be the start of a new week, a new beginning and a re-energized me!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Recipe Thursday and other ramblings

Yes, I have a recipe today...well, kind of. I have been really busy and did come across one the other day that I wanted to share with you but as usual I got sidetracked and forgot about it. So today is an easy one for all of you that can't cook, don't like to cook, don't cook. It's really not a recipe, you'll see.

So let me tell you, I hate yogurt. I despise it but it's good for you and we should try to eat what's good for us, right? So, here's what you do.


Fat free vanilla yogurt - one lg container
sugar free/fat free cheesecake flavored jello pudding mix

Mix the dry jello mix and yogurt together. Tada! You have cheesecake and it tastes pretty darn good!!! Easy, huh?


In other news, everyone that has come into my house I have them go into the guest bedroom (ex roommate's room) and make them smell it. I know cruel and unusual punishment. I want to make sure it's not just me. It's not. It really does stink. So let's see the carpet cleaner guy, my best friend, F, the remodeler guy and the pest control guy all say the room F*(#&%# stinks. My remodeler guy was there last night and told me I am going to have to tear out the carpet and probably will have to bleach the concrete because the stench has probably permeated the concrete. Today, I need to go get an estimate for carpeting *sigh. I could probably live with the stain but I can't live with stench. I haven't decided how I want to persue it with the roommate other than sending a bill as an FYI knowing full well I will never see any money. I know if I took her to court it's not going to ruin her credit anymore than it already is and it's only going to cost me more money and headache than it's probably worth. However, I am going to make it very clear to her that she is a nasty slob. The remodeler offered to drop the nasty carpet off at her new place...hehe. That would be evil. I like it :). Ok, now that I have that out of my system (that is going to make me sick...it is stressing me out). I have exciting news. No, it's not about 6pack :(. 6pack has been really busy lately. I don't hear from him much when he is busy :(. They also extended him again :(. Ok, I digress..back to the exciting news!!!

I mentioned remodeler, right? I am finally going to get my bathroom remodeled. YAY!!! My bathroom currently is surrounded in powder blue tile (vomits) and the vanity top is this blue/vomit mix color with a cracked/chipped sink. It did have blue butterfly wallpaper on the walls. I tore that off at one point and there is still the glue on the walls. I will have to take pictures of it. It really is disgusting. He is going to gut it. There is a wall between my vanity and my toilet and we are removing that so I can have a bigger vanity (yay) and totally just taking everything out and getting all new. He is giving me a great price too. I can't wait to show pictures!! So hopefully by the end of next week I will have a new bathroom. He had gone out into my garage and noticed that I don't have a dryer vent that leads to outside. He said he would even make me a vent as a bonus. I like this guy. Well, as long as he doesn't take off with my money. I had to give him a large deposit..yikes! I did tell him if he takes off with my money I will hunt him down and kill him :). I always make it very clear to contractors that I am usually very easy to deal with until you screw me. Screw me, and I will become a bitch FAST and you will wish that you didn't do business with me :). Thank you mom for teaching me the ropes...hehe.

OK, enough rambling. I really am super busy at work...lol.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I have a headache...

My goals are going by the wayside again. Some of it is motivation, but truly the biggest problem right now is my head. No smart remarks. My neck is killing me, which in turn gives me killer headaches. I have had a headache for a month now, maybe longer. Some days are worse than others. It is very hard for me to want to go to the gym or do much of anything when I want to take a chainsaw and cut my head off. Hmm, wonder if I use a hacksaw if it would count for activity points. Anyway, I need to probably call the chiropractor. A few years ago, my two left-most fingers on my left hand were numb all the time. I went to the doctor and they told me it was something with the ulnar nerve in my elbow, kind of like carpal tunnel but in the elbow. They did surgery to move the nerve over. I have a lovely scar on my elbow now and still have numb fingers. I learned to deal with it. It's not nearly as bad as it used to be. It had gotten so bad that it hurt to run cold water over the tips of my fingers. By this point, my mother told me to see a chiropractor. I had always been reluctant to see one because of the all the horror stories and the thoughts that they aren't real doctors, etc. However, I am more inclined today to probably take a more natural approach to things. What this Adonnis told me (yes, he was absolutely gorgeous and very married) was that your neck is supposed to be curved. Mine is straight. I had some bone spurs in my neck, which would cause the numbness in my fingers. Anyway, I think it's time to go back. I can't take this headaches anymore. I can barely function. I am popping Ibuprofen everyday and I don't like taking medicines. I want to get back in the gym seeing as I am paying for it. Anyone else suffer from anything similar and have a magic solution to the headaches?

Now, on to the drama...the roommate. Oh wait, the ex roommate. I say that with a HUGE smile. She texts me last night asking about her deposit. I told her I mailed her letter yesterday. She asked me how much the check was for. I told her she wouldn't be getting one back. Well, that turned into several more text messages, very scathing text messages from her telling me that if I was going to screw her why didn't I just let her leave instead of her cleaning the bathroom and vacuuming the bedroom, etc. Basically, she was telling me that if she would have known she wouldn't get any of her deposit back that she wouldn't have cleaned up at all. Now, if she would have taken care of things she would have gotten her deposit back. As it is, she has cost me money. There was brown goo dripping from the walls. There was dried blood on the back of the door (I assume from her dog). She had overstuffed the closet so much the closet doors are off their track and the paint has been scraped off the top. Those need to be sanded down and repainted. The corner of my nightstand had been chipped. There is a run in my berber carpeting. There was blue ink on one of the walls. There were several stains in the carpet and the stench, I can't even explain to you. She doused the carpet with Pet Fresh (you know, those powder carpet fresheners to mask smells) so now it smells like a wet stinky dog that has been covered in Pet Fresh. I had someone come in and professionally clean the carpet and he did a great job. However, he wasn't a miracle worker. The stains are still there and the stench is still there. The stench is so powerful, Febreeze can't do anything with it. I am going to have to replace the carpeting and she thinks she is going to get her deposit back? I don't think so. If anything, I am sending her a bill.

Monday, September 8, 2008

My body confuses me...

My body confuses me. I did absolutely nothing last week in regards to counting points, exercising, etc. I tried to watch what I ate but if I was in the mood for something I ate it. I ate when I was hungry and probably sometimes when I really wasn't. There were days when I was ravenous, and would end up having a burger for lunch. Oh yeah, that reminds me I was craving beef last week. I had a couple of burgers. I even had fast food twice. So definitely not my typical on the wagon week. The funny thing is, I lost weight. I lost 2.4 lbs. It makes absolutely no flipping sense to me. Unless of course, maybe my new thyroid meds or the Topomax is working?

I am finally biting the bullet and heading to a WW meeting tonight. I am going to go for as long as I can financially afford to do so.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Not Good, Not Good at All

For those of you that don't live in Hurricane Alley, you probably don't pay much attention to these storms. For those of us that do, when a new one develops most of us are glued to the news watching each update to see where it's going and when. Ike, has a new projected path. According to newscasters, Ike is headed to my doorstep. This is not a good thing. I think I will wait on that remodeling. If Ike hits my house, I wonder if he will take requests to only hit the bathrooms and the kitchen. Please leave the rest of the house alone .

I have no other updates. No 6pack updates, no F updates, no exercise updates..in fact no exercise, no health updates. Oops, just rememebered yesterday was Recipe Thursday. I am slacking!!!

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Another Challenge?

I have to get something off my chest. This has nothing to do with our healthy lifestyle changes, 6pack or F even. This has to do with that mother that killed her baby by putting it in the microwave. I just read that she was spared the death penalty. I am sure there are probably some that don't believe in the death penalty, that is fine. We all have our opinions but this woman put a baby in the microwave and she escaped the death penalty? WTF? Some people should just not breed. I can't tell you how much this pisses me off. (tells myself to breathe).

Ok, moving on...

It seems there is some demand to do another challenge. I am up for doing another one. Ginesa offered to put up a gift certificate for the next winner, but quite frankly do we really need prizes? I just would like a break for a week or two before we get started again. I also think that this one was a bit too long. Would it be more motivational if we were on teams? Or every man or in our case woman for herself again? Your thoughts? Maybe weight shouldn't be the ultimate goal...maybe it's the number of minutes of exercise or number of days sticking to your program....give me your ideas. What do you want?

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

and the Winner is...

Not me!

Lynn, took first place in the Bloggers' Biggest Loser Challenge with a total of 11.86% body weight loss! Great job, girl!

Our second place winner was Ginesa (9.90% body weight lost) and third was Manuela (8.65% body weight lost). You guys did absolutely awesome!

Now, for the exciting stuff! Prizes! Oh, and by the way I am changing the rules at the last minute. I can do this because it is my contest :). I was only going to give out two prizes but seeing as Manuela and PTG are so damn close, I am giving a third.

Lynn, gets first choice. You get to put a picture, artwork, whatever you want on one of the following (I will give you the specs in a separate email). PTG, then gets second choice, then Manuela.

Congratulations, ladies! You worked hard and did awesome!

For all you other LOSERS out there, you did great too! I, unfortunately was the big gainer :(. I will update the status sheet and leave it there for the remainder of the week.


I have updated my goals for September. Let's see if I can meet them this time! I was doing great with the exercise until I got sick and just haven't gotten back at it. I have to get my head back there again. It's just so frustrating and so un-motivating not to see any results when I do everything right. I lose my steam. This is how I have always lost my steam in the past. Why exert the energy to watch what I eat and go to the gym if the results are the same as if I don't watch what I eat and don't go to the gym? I know I can't think like this but it's hard. I struggle with it every day. I desperately want to lose weight. I have wanted that since I was 7 years old or earlier when all the kids started teasing me. I have been really good about taking my thyroid pills and my new Topomax so am trying to be patient. I am also going to start trying to get to the gym 5 days a week. Maybe that's what it is going to take for me. Maybe I am not one of those that can go 2-3x a week. Grrr, that pisses me off too. I just want you to know that. Ok, so I am done whining, venting, feeling sorry for myself or whatever the hell I was just doing. Time to make myself some reasonable goals.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Weekend News

I hope everyone had a fabulous Labor Day weekend. It was an interesting weekend for me. Let's start with my weigh-in, shall we? I am at a whopping 280.2 lbs. That should put me at the top for being the highest gainer in my challenge. You know, that really isn't what I had in mind when I decided to do this...lol. It's ok,though. I'm moving on. I'm taking my meds, I am going back to the gym today, it's all good. Get your weights in so we can start talking about prizes!!

Now, onto the good stuff. Roommate is gone. History!!! What an ordeal that has been!!! She has had all month to move stuff. Whoever her new landlord is allowed her access to move her stuff during the month. You would think that you would move some of your things as you could so you didn't have to do it all at once, right? No. On Sunday, she started moving. Mind you, this means packing too. Then, she says to me "I am off on Tuesday, I can come clean then". I think I looked at her in shock. I said "XXXX, no it does't work that way. Today is your last day here, it needs to be done today. " That didn't go over well. Quite frankly, I didn't care. Don't clean, you don't get your security deposit..simple as that. So, instead she was there until 3a Monday morning moving/cleaning. Her idea of cleaning the carpet was to put an entire container of Pet Fresh carpet freshener down and vacuuming. Let's disguise the stench for a little while. Monday morning I get up and access the damages in the daylight. I need to hire a professional carpet cleaner and pray that the carpet comes clean. The carpet was new when she moved in. It it disgusting now. Now, the stench in the room is a mixture of stale body odor, dog odor and pet fresh. It is not a pleasant smell. The bathroom was never perfect so I could really care less about it as I am repainting, caulking, and all that other stuff in there anyway. It was so nice to be able to get up and just walk through the house naked (sorry for the visual...lol).

Now, onto the better stuff.... :)

Oh, where do I start 6-pack or F. I will leave 6-pack for the end..haha. F helped yesterday with picking up a vanity at Home Depot and we had lunch. It wasn't strained, so it was nice. Last night we talked and I told him that I have been doing some soul searching. Basically, that I will always care about him but I have come to the realization that we will never BE. He told me that he misses me but he knows he needs to close old chapters in his life to move on emotionally. He also told me that he knows that he is sometimes screwed up between the ears...hehe.

6pack..I don't even know where to begin. He wrote some more poems that were written for me about me. He has such an amazing way with words. I am anxiously awaiting his return. Of course, even when he gets back I won't be able to see him right away. *sigh He will have to go through all the evaluations, then he will be spending time with his family so it might be another two months.

His best friend emailed me over the weekend and told me that I scare the shit out of him...lol. She said not in a horror movie kind of way, but in the sense that I make him feel things he thought were dead inside. She also said that he told her that his writer's block is gone now and she attributes it to me. She thanked me. She said I might be the best thing to happen to him in a long time. That was probably the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

So there's the juice of the day...