Tuesday, July 28, 2009

I lived...

Well, I had the reunion this past weekend. Let me start with the clothes. That adorable outfit with the peacock feathers came just in time and the picture is a little misleading. The colors were extremely bright and clashing. Needless to say I didn't wear it and it is being sent back. I ended up going in "80's attire". Next time, I'm just going to wear what I feel confident in.

Friday night was the best night, of course that could be because I drank more that night. :) Many of the people that I wanted to see didn't show up. There were a few of my friends back from the day that did show up so I was extremely happy about that. The girls, some of them had gained a little bit of weight but they still looked fabulous. A number of the men improved with age. KJ, for one. He has aged very well. It's too bad he couldn't show up Saturday night too. Around 9:30 or so I decided to go outside because it was flipping hot inside the clubhouse and everyone was going to be heading to one of the local stomping grounds in a few minutes. I went outside and was quite surprised when J was standing there. We went and sat down and talked for a few. Everyone was leaving to head to the local bar and my ride (I was not in any shape to drive) asked me if I was going with him. I told him I would find a ride. J said he would drive me up there. J drove me up to the bar and we sat in the parking lot for a few minutes talking about old memories and yes, we kissed. One of those kisses that makes you weak in the knees...that perfect kiss, no fumbling around, the perfect in sync kiss. *sigh He told me had to go pick up his son so he couldn't stay. I kissed him goodbye and headed inside.

Drinks were flowing, lots of laughing, catching up with old friends and one of my bestest, bestest friends throughout high school came in. I haven't seen her in probably 18 years or so. She looked fabulous. We talked for a few, promised to keep in touch and then I was headed back to the hotel. J was coming back.

I had a wonderful time with J that night, what little time we spent together. As much as I would love to have something with him, I don't believe that is in the cards. I still don't think I'm his "type". I think for the evening, I filled a void for him...cured the lonliness for just a bit. I haven't called him since that night and he hasn't called me. I figured I would call him this weekend see if he wants to shoot some pool or something with some friends and I. I don't want to lose touch with him again. We will see, though. I have learned that having high hopes for anything usually ends in disappointment.

Saturday night was not nearly as fun as Friday night. I still attribute some of that to my lack of drinking on Saturday night. Another reason is that it was so hot and humid, it was miserable. The clubhouse at the resort we were at was stifling and even the porch out to the water was just as bad. I would just be standing there and I could feel sweat running down my back. ICK!!
One of my former classmates is a stripper down in Key West and her boyfriend is the spitting image of George Clooney. Oh yes, not a close resemblance but I'm talking pretty much his twin when he has that rugged look about him. After the clubhouse closed, my friends S and T wanted to go the closest country bar. I warned them that on Saturdays, it is mostly 18 year olds. Yes, they let them in! We drove 30 minutes, paid our $12, used the restroom and walked out. It was wall to wall 18 year olds, ughhh. We ended up meeting up with an old friend of T's and his girlfriend at a Tiki bar. The tiki bar wasn't bad. We played some darts and pool. We tried getting the girlfriend to play but she had the personality of a rock. She wouldn't talk to us, she wouldn't play darts, she wouldn't play pool, she just stood there like a statue. T's friend was outgoing and fun and I just didn't see the connection between the two. It was such an odd couple.

We ended the night about 3a. I had pretty much enough and was exhausted. There was a buffet on Sunday to bid farewell to everyone but I decided to skip it. As fun as it was to see everyone and catch up on the last 20 years, all my old high school insecurities came back in full force.
They are already talking about either a yearly cruise or the next reunion in 5 years. I will be thin for it, if it kills me!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Time to live is now...

I'm getting excited and anxious about my reunion, only a couple more days. Damn, I wish I was thinner but, oh well I still look good. The funny thing about the reunion is that it seems everyone that is going has started looking up our old classmates and we are connecting via the Internet. Last night, I found J. I had a crush on him in high school. He was a couple of years older than me. I emailed him and asked if he remembered me. He did so we started emailing back and forth. Today, we spent nearly 3 hours on the phone. J was the first boy I "experimented with" and apparently after our conversation today I was his first to experiment with him. LOL No wonder he remembers me. We don't remember why we stopped talking but I do know that I wasn't his type in school, I mean after all I was overweight then too. We talked about his family. His older brother was killed 7 years ago in a robbery. His brother was working on a man's roof and 3 black men came and robbed the guy. J2 (the brother) hit him one of them on the head and they turned around and shot him. J2 was a great guy, it's very sad. Then he told me that one of our friends that we used to hang out with died last year of leukemia.

As anxious I am for the reunion, I don't want to hear any more bad stories about the ones that didn't show up because something bad happened to them. I know it's a fact of life and the process of getting older, but it sucks.

So here's living for today! You never know when tomorrow may not be here. As a side note, J and I will be getting together after the reunion for a drink or two. You never know, maybe we can rekindle something that happened 20+ years ago.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

The First Week WI Results Are In..

Yes, I have been peeking the second half of the week that I have had access to my scale, sue me :). I have been following the program 95% of the time throughout the week and decided on Friday I could have a real meal and went to Longhorn Steakhouse. Remind me not to do that again. It's not that going to Longhorn was a bad thing. The bad thing was that I ate more than I had all week combined and I felt awful afterwards. I mean, I wanted to vomit. I have never "binged" like this before, at least it felt like binging after a week of baby food jar size servings. Even though, I had my one meal that tasted absolutely delicious going down, I still lost 5.6 pounds the first week. YAY me!
I also found a lunch yesterday in NutriSystem that I absolutely love. It is the fudge graham bar. It tastes like a Whatchamacallit. YUMMY!!!!

...and to other topics. Next weekend is my 20 year high school reunion. Yikes! I wanted to be thin for it. Hmm, I don't think that is happening. I was a big girl in high school, so at least there won't be a surprise when they see me. I went shopping yesterday and found absolutely nothing. I had ordered a couple of things I found online and pray that it gets here in time. So everyone cross their fingers that it gets here in time, that its not sized small and that it looks great on!!!! That picture to the right is for the first night. It is a weekend reunion that is fairly casual. Friday night is 80s night (or it is encouraged anyway), Saturday is Hawaiian Luau (picture on left) and Sunday is a farewell brunch.

So everyone send their looking thin vibes my way :)

Wednesday, July 15, 2009


Today, my entry is about the acai berry, pronounced a-sigh-ee. Acai has been used for many generations by the natives of Brazil. Acai boasts 10 times the antioxidant benefits of grapes and twice that of blueberries and is now being advertised everywhere about its health benefits. BEWARE: DO NOT FALL FOR THESE FREE TRIAL OFFERS!!!!! THEY ARE SCAMS. If you want to try it go to your local health food store. That is my public service announcement for today :). Ok, back to my speel about the acai. I have personal friends that swear by it. I haven't used it long enough to know whether or not if it truly helps but I will say that since I have been taking it (about a week) I haven't been as hungry and I'm eating 1000-1300 calories a day but it's too soon to tell. Here's what they say about it (whoever they is):

What are the 59 Health Benefits that Made Acai Berry So Famous?

Prolongs Your Life
Increases Your Energy
Increases Your Overall Strength
Helps you Look and Feel Younger
Helps You Maintain Healthy Blood Pressure
Prevents Cancer
Helps You Maintain Healthy Cholesterol Levels
Promotes Normal Blood Sugar
Enhances Sexual Function
Helps You Lose Weight
Relieves Headaches and Dizziness
Improves Quality of Sleep
Improves Your Vision
Strengthens Your Heart
Inhibits Lipid Peroxidation
Improves Disease Resistance
Strengthens Your Immune System
Helps Your Body Fight Cancer
Protects Your Precious DNA
Inhibits Tumor Growth
Reduces the Toxic Effects of Chemotherapy and Radiation
Helps to Build Strong Blood
Helps with Chronic Dry Cough
Fights Inflammation and Arthritis
Improves Lymphocyte Count
Improves Menopausal Symptoms
Prevents Morning Sickness
Improves Fertility
Strengthens Your Muscles and Bones
Supports Normal Kidney Function
Improves Your Memory
Supports Healthy Liver Function
Alleviates Anxiety and Stress
Improves Your Mood
Improves Your Digestion
Helps You Maintain Healthy Gums
Fights Fibromyalgia
Prevents Allergies
Protects Children’s Health
Promotes Overall Wellness
Increases workout recovery
Increases injury recovery
Helps to Reduce Physical Injuries
Relieves Arthritis Pain
Helps to Clear Skin of Warts
Reduces the Occurrence of Seizures
Helps Improve & Even Cure Leukemia
Fights General Depression
Supports Weight Loss through Fat Loss
Helps Slow Down the Aging Process
Provides all Vital Vitamins
Contains Several Important Minerals
Is an extremely Powerful Free Radical Fighter
Acai has very High Levels of Fibers
Cleanses and Detoxifies the Body of Infectious Toxins
Helps to Prevent Heart Problems
Improves Mental Clarity/Focus
Improves Circulation
Cures Osteoporosis

Now, here is what WebMed says about it:

Can acai berries boost weight loss?

Scientists are learning more about the functional power of superfoods, such as the acai berry. Although acai is touted in some weight loss products, few studies have tested the benefit of acai in promoting weight loss.

For now, plenty of research supports eating a diet rich in antioxidants. There’s no doubt that berries and other fruits are a key part of any healthy diet promoting weight loss. The jury’s still out on whether there is something special about acai’s ability to shed excess pounds.

Why are acai berries used in beauty products?

Some cosmetics and beauty products contain acai oil in the ingredient list. That’s because acai oil is a powerhouse of antioxidants. Studies show that acai oil may be a safe alternative to other tropical oils used in beauty products such as facial and body creams, anti-aging skin therapies, shampoos and conditioners, and other products. When acai oil is processed and stored long-term, the antioxidant levels remain high.

Do acai berries and acai juice have any side effects?
If you have pollen allergies or have a known hypersensitivity to acai or similar berries, you may want to avoid this fruit. When eaten in moderate amounts, though, acai is likely safe.

Here is another link with information on the acai http://www.acai-health.com/info.php.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

NutriSystem and Why....

Well, I had my 3rd day on NutriSystem and let's just say it wasn't a good day. Not because of my willpower but because the food I had today wasn't fit for a dog. My lunch was Parmesan Pasta with Brocolli, absolutely horrible. *Vomit. I had to throw it out, so I ate my mixed veggies for lunch. I passed on the cookies being passed around the table. Yay me! For dinner, I was having chicken with rice, vegetables and almonds. Sound good? Um, no. I think my dog would have turned his nose up at it! So now I know there are two foods that are off the shopping list. I ended up having to find something at my mom's house to eat so I had an egg sandwich with my broccoli.

So far the good/decent foods have been: blueberry muffins, meatloaf with mashed potatoes, thick crust pizza, cheesy potatoes, chocolate chocolate chip pudding, fudge brownie, white chocolate macadamia nut cookie, rice with beans and sausage.

Many wonder why I have decided to go with NutriSystem instead of just buying Lean Cuisines or something at the store and doing it my own for possibly less money and possibly better tasting food. I'm going to tell you why...

I did NutriSystem many years ago and had success with it, prior to them having as many choices as they have now. I had lost 40lbs with it fairly easy. Of course, I didn't keep it off. Here's my thinking though. I have to dish out $300 a month for the food. That's a lot of money up front for food. I'm one of those that if I don't feel like eating what I have for lunch/dinner, I will get something else normally. Paying $300 a month for food, doesn't allow me that choice. I don't have to think about the food so much anymore. I just fill out the number of each that I want for breakfasts, lunches and dinners and I'm done. Granted, I still need to go to the store and buy a few things like veggies, fruits, the occasional roll, milk on occasion but you get the point. I don't plan on doing this forever because I know me well enough to know that I can't. I want to eat healthier and eating processed food despite how many vitamins you fill it with doesn't necessarily make it healthier. I just need the kickstart. Time will tell...

Monday, July 13, 2009

Good morning!

Wow, three days in a row of posting. I'm ok after the initial shock of the ex. Actually, he had been sick for awhile so I shouldn't have been shocked but ..hell, I can't explain it. The feelings I had were odd too...I wasn't devastated, I was a little sad. I don't know if it was for me or if it was for him. It had been years since we talked because he thought I was dog shit because I left him (I had good reason). I don't know if the feelings of mourning I have are because it is that "emotional" week or because I did at one time love the man. It's all very confusing to me. I wish him and I would have had that chance to just talk about what went wrong but he never gave me that chance. I like to close chapters. That book was slammed shut years ago instead of gently closed. Anyway enough of that...

My first day on NutriSystem was a success...yay! I haven't had a successful day at much of anything lately so this is HUGE! Of course, I spend the first few days of the week at my folks' house to save on driving time to my job and pack up my food and guess what?! I forgot my flipping breakfasts! I am improvising though by bagging up some kashi dry cereal.

I will post my weight next week after I see how I do for the week. I am going to be blogging again if it kills me. It helps keep me on track and I miss you ladies.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

It's a Sad Day

Once upon a time I was married, a long long time ago. Despite the many problems we had he had a good heart just a good heart with many issues. I'm not going to go into them because it just really isn't important. I spoke to his mother a few years ago (which I had never met) and she told me what he had told her about why we had split and of course, he had lied to her but he lied about everything. She told me that he was really sick and needed a liver transplant and he was being an asshole and wouldn't get one. I was online tonight searching for a couple of old friends and decided to look for him because I do occasionally think about him. He died in January, he was 41. Despite, all the crap he put me through, despite everything, I am saddened by it. If we were still married, I would be a widow right now and that is just very depressing.

Luckily, we had no children and he never had any children so there aren't any children out there missing their father. May he rest in peace.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Ok, I know it's July

Ok, Diana I'm here! :P

Yes, I know I haven't updated this in months. Things haven't changed much. I still have no time. I have unfortunately gained some of the weight back that I lost. However, I am starting NutriSystem on Sunday. I just don't have the time to cook healthy meals these days so more times than not, dinners have been fast food for the past few months, not good for the waistline! So, in an effort to get everything under control I'm going to try to be able to afford NutriSystem to try to get things under control. My appetite has been out of control. I am a flipping bottomless pit lately but of course I attribute it to the lack of nutrition.

I haven't seen the gym in months. It's all rather depressing.

The job, well ....it's a job. I was recently sick and had to call in and I was docked 8 hours and I'm salary. Granted, I'm expected to work over 40 hours without extra pay but I get docked 8 hours for being sick. So, that should tell ya something without me going into too much detail. I like the people I work with, at least the majority so I'm going to stick it out.

Quite frankly, I hate where my life is at but I'm trying to look at it as a temporary situation and I'm working on trying to fix the parts that I can. I have my 20 yr reunion next weekend and hoped I would be thin for it. Hmm, I guess I will have to cut off 1/2 my body to do that...lol.

Maybe tomorrow, I can find a few minutes to come see your blogs to see how you guys are doing.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Good Intentions

I know I said I would try to update my blog at least once a week but that hasn't happened. I barely have time to do anything. By the time I get home from work I have about 2 hours to cook something for dinner, eat it, clean up and try to get stuff done around the house before I have to head to bed to do it all over again. I'm not liking it. I'm not liking much of anything. I'm hoping in time things get easier at work when I can get my head wrapped around things. I remember hating my last job for the first few months too. The people there are great. If I end up staying there, I do have to move eventually because this driving 1/2 the week and staying at my mom's the other 1/2 is just not working for me. My house is not as clean as it normally would be, simply because I just don't have the time to keep it up. My yard is not weed free because I just don't have the time. I haven't been to the gym in who knows how long.

I have been trying to eat clean the past couple of weeks, been doing so so. I haven't lost any weight to speak of but haven't gained either. I guess that is something but I really wanted to be down for my 20 year reunion coming up in July. I really need to get my head back into it. It's just so hard when there aren't enough hours in the day. Now, on Sundays when I'm at my mom's I am trying to cook several days worth of food to try to get past the time part.

No love life. No time for one, which is fine. Every man I meet isn't worth my time anyway, lol. Although, I have to say I ran into my future ex-husband the other day. I was walking through the hospital and ran into him. I don't know what part of the hospital he worked in. He winked at me (he probably winks at everyone) but dang, he was fine. :)

So, there you have it in a nutshell....I have no time. I hope life settles down. I miss you all. I hope all is well in your world. I haven't even been able to check up on you guys. I can't use blogger at work (dang job). I'm not giving up on the blog and I do plan on updating when I can but if you want to keep in touch, let me know and I will send you my personal email address.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

The Job

Today was the 3rd day of the new job. The first two days was all orientation and most didn't apply to me, it was more clinical. Although, even though it was clinical it was still interesting and I learned a great deal. Today, I sat with a few from my new department and a software vendor for a demo. I really hope I'm not in over my head. It's my number one fear. I do know that I will not be able to update my blog as much as I used to (many moons ago) as a couple nights a week I will be spending at my mom's (and she always wants to know what I am typing on the computer) and there won't be any personal stuff going on at the computer at work. I will probably be updating my blog about once a week with any new updates on weight, etc. It's time to get back to what this blog is supposed to be about. I am changing my weigh in days to Wednesdays because I should be sleeping in my own bed Tuesday nights (YAY!). I do have some pretty good news about the job though. I get 50% off in the cafeteria and there is a salad bar. Guess how much my lunch has cost me the past couple of days? The first day I had salad bar with a drink and the salad is weighed (.20 per ounce). Lunch was a whopping $2.07! Yesterday, I had a stuffed chicken breast with au gratin potatoes and some zucchini and a drink for $3.23. Today, I had ham and some fried okra and a drink for $2.57! I can't bring my lunch for that price. The portions are perfect for watching your weight. I'm also getting exercise because I have to park like 3-4 blocks away because I can't ever find parking so this job might actually be good for my health in several ways! YAY!

I just really, really hope I'm not in over my head. Once I have adjusted to this getting up at the ass crack of dawn again and I'm not so exhausted at 7p, I'm going to spend an evening to catch up on all of you. I want to know what's going on in your lives!!!!

Thursday, March 19, 2009


Good morning strangers. I know it's been awhile again since I updated. I start the job finally on Monday. So many emotions...scared to death, anxious, did I say scared to death, ready for routine again. For the past several weeks, I have been driving back and forth for physicals, TB tests, etc. Surprisingly enough, I have pretty much maintained my weight throughout this layoff period which is a great thing!!! It's time to focus again. Monday starts my new life with a new job, new people, a whole new county to date (hehe). I am looking forward to having some routine in my life again. Not that I haven't somewhat enjoyed the time off but I have found without routine, I can very easily get lazy because I could always "do it tomorrow". I have accomplished some things on my house while I was off but not nearly as much as I should have. When I work during the week, I only have the weekend to get things done, so things get done. I know it's a mindset but for whatever reason I couldn't make my mind see that while I was off from work. I am looking forward to going to the gym again. The hospital is also a non-smoking campus so if I want to smoke I will have to leave the property (not likely to happen) so it will also help me to quit. Yay!!!!

I hope all is well in your worlds and I will be checking up on all of you soon. Miss you guys.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Why I have been MIA...

I have been in my own little world for a long time now. I haven't had much desire to be blogging although I do miss checking up on you guys. I apologize and even though I'm not checking up on you and leaving you messages, I do think about you. For the past several days, I've been sick. Not sick, in having a cold. Actually, I'm really not sure what is wrong. I have had chest pain for five days. Saturday night I had a fever of 102 and decided that Sunday morning I would go to the urgent care clinic. Sunday morning I woke up and the fever was pretty much gone but felt nauseous and ended up getting sick, all of which are not good signs. I went to the clinic and the doctor (which I have to tell you about) did chest X-rays and an EKG. The chest X-rays came back ok but the EKG showed some irregularities. I know nothing about EKGs but it had some dips where I guess there shouldn't have been. He was concerned because of me having Lupus. Now, before I go any further I have to tell you about this doctor. I felt like crap. I looked like hell...literally. I did nothing with my hair, no makeup, crappy clothes on...I didn't care when I left the house. Of course, I should have. This doctor was fine. He was 36, had four degrees, was thinking about going back to school for law, I could go on and on. So, I knew I had to have the EKG and if he was going to be doing it I was going to tell him that he was going to have to take me out on a date first before he could see my breasts....lol but luckily it was the nurse. I did tell her. I'm sure she ended up telling him I said that.

So anyway, because of the EKG he was really concerned about me and didn't even want me to drive myself to the emergency room. I did drive myself to the emergency room. I get to the ER and was immediately brought in. I was shocked. They did chest Xrays again and another EKG and a bunch of blood work. They hooked me up to heart monitors, oxygen and an IV. The Dr came by at one point asked what the problem was and I told him and I never saw him again. All I found out was that my chest xrays were clear, lungs were clear, no heart attack, heart looked good, oxygen levels looked good, I wasn't pregnant (duh!), I still had an irregular EKG and I had chest pain. My prognosis was that I had chest pain. They don't know why. They don't know if it will go away. They don't know what's causing it but I can go home. How's that for a $4800 hospital bill, not including the doctor's fee (for the whole 2 minutes he spent with me). I will be interested to see what his fee will be.

I can't get in to see my doctor right now because now I am in between insurance because apparently my insurance stopped Feb 7th and I haven't gotten my Cobra paperwork yet. I had to pay $500 on Sunday between the urgent care and ER and I just can't put out anymore money at this point without having a paycheck yet....lol. No wonder I'm having chest pains. I am feeling a little bit better but still not 100%. The bright side is that I am down to 267. I haven't really been trying much and obviously I haven't been working out.

Once, I have some structure in my life again I will be back. Right now, it's just so difficult. I need structure. I miss structure (I think). Just know, I haven't forgotten you guys. I think about all of ya and hope you're doing well. I will be harassing all of you soon enough :).

Thursday, February 12, 2009

I'm Employed!!!

The Director called me this morning and offered me the minimum that I had asked for and I accepted. I don't know when my start date is but will have to go through a background check, physical and orientation. So now, I can actually enjoy my time off. I have a job!!!!!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Verdict is in...

Well, I went there yesterday and was offered the position. I'm not dancing on tables. The first offer was pitiful to say the least. Many would say I should accept it because it's a job. However, it is 78 miles away (one way) and it would make it extremely difficult to look for another job. They offered an additional $3000 a year and still was not enough. The salary that they are offering is $38k below what the median income is for this position. Now, I wasn't asking for what the median was, not even close. I found out the benefit package isn't all that great. There are no paid holidays, you have to use alloted time they give you to take off the holidays, which really leaves no vacation time. Ughh. The job, would however, give me unbelievable experience for my future. So, you see how I am torn? Last night, I was ready to decline the job and my parents even supported my decision. This morning I called the IT director and told him that I was a bit disappointed in what was offered, that I appreciated the opportunity but unfortunately at the salary they were offering I was going to have to turn it down. He told me that he was actually meeting with his boss today to talk about the position. I told him the minimum I would take and he told me that he would get back to me this afternoon.

So, I was offered the job. I declined the job and now I am waiting to hear again. I feel like I am at a used car lot.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Still waiting...

You were expecting news, weren't you? Well, not quite. I drove the 70 miles on Friday to see HR and was waiting for the phone call to tell me the exact time. The recruiter calls me around 10:30 and tells me that she is sorry but HR couldn't meet with me that day. *sigh. She still legally can't tell me anything but what she did tell me is that this HR interview should have already happened and we are kind of in backtrack mode. Once I interview with HR, it will take 5-10 days for a background check and I will need to have a physical. I hate physicals and of course, I have no idea of how in depth this physical is. From what she told me, I am pretty sure that they are offering me the position and that the HR interview is now just a formality to meet protocol. So tomorrow, is the HR interview. I should know tomorrow! Of course, I know I have said that numerous times already..hehe. However, I do believe tomorrow is the day....FINALLY!

Thursday, February 5, 2009

Waiting is almost over....

Well, I was supposed to find out today about THE job and I didn't get an offer. However, from the crypic talk I had with the recruiter it's all looking good. I have been asked to go to the HR department tomorrow and then afterwards go speak with the IT director. Apparently, he just found out today that HR had to be involved in the process. Protocol is causing the delay. So, it appears that I will probably get an offer tomorrow. I don't really know what HR has in store for me so....

On another note, I did meet someone yesterday. His name is S. I'm not sure exactly how I feel towards him yet. He kind of gave me a hard time yesterday over something stupid and not sure I like that. Anyway, the pictures I saw of him were very nice, a little misleading but not horribly. I'm sure people have said the same about me too. The one problem I did have is he was a little too touchy feely with me an hour or two into our meeting. So, not sure how I feel about it just yet. Time will tell and quite honestly I don't really care either way.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Still waiting...

Friday came and went and no phone call other than from their recruiter. Maybe Monday, she says. Monday has come and gone and still no answer. The recruiter did call me Monday and tell me that she spoke with the IT Director and he told her that he is comfortable with me and thinks that I can do the job but he has to consider the other candidates. He also told her that he has to meet with his team this week and mull it over with them and for her to call him on Thursday. So I wait...

Today, I am off to see the doctor to get all my prescriptions refilled. Thursday I am off to see the dentist to get my teefers cleaned. Now, I need to make an eye appointment. Insurance will be gone soon. Severance will be gone soon. *sigh

So here's hoping for good news on Thursday or for the 500 other jobs I have applied for in the past two months.

Friday, January 30, 2009


I am sitting by the phone today. Why, you ask? The recruiter for the job that I applied for called me yesterday and told me that the IT director would be calling me yesterday or today. No calls, yesterday. I assume if he is calling me, he is calling me to extend an offer. If he was not going to extend an offer, again I assume that he would just go through the recruiter.

The recruiter called me a little bit ago to find out if I had heard from him. Nope. So, I sit here and wait. Stressed, excited, nervous....you name it, my emotions are running the gammit.

I have one and half severance checks left, so the nerves are a little bit frayed.

I haven't done much lately in regards to my "diet" but am still holding at where I was. My good intentions to get to the gym everyday went by the wayside. I spend most of my days looking for a job, revising resume to fit the job, creating cover letters, etc. That has been the priority in my life for obvious reasons. However, Monday I am forcing myself out of bed in the morning and going to the gym then look for a job (if needed). My 20 year high school reunion is in July (yikes) and I definitely would like to be about 40-50lbs thinner. I can do it, if I really, really work hard.

So cross your fingers that my phone rings soon with good news, before I lose my mind :).

5:25P Update: Still no phone call *sigh. Recruiter just called again to tell me that it's not a bad sign that he hasn't called. Either way they have to contact her, it's in their contract. She didn't want to call him again and be pushy. Good! I don't want a pushy recruiter that works for them be the cause of me not getting the job. So, as of right now....nada, zilch, nothing.

Friday, January 23, 2009

The interview...

I had my face-to-face interview yesterday and it seemed to go well. I think that I would get along well with the group, if I was hired. Some of the interview was serious and I am not sure I always gave him the answer he was looking for but did the best I could. One of the questions which I had absolutely no problem answering is, "what really ticks you off".

As I was leaving, I did ask the IT Director if he had any concerns about my abilities to perform the job and he told me no. He had told me that there are three other candidates (bleh) and that I should know something within three weeks. It was at that point, that I did something I haven't done in the past but all these job interviewing tips tell you to do it. I asked for the position. He told me that it was good to know that I wanted the position and he would be in touch. The recruiter called me later and left a message that he told her he was excited about me. It's definitely a good sign but these three other candidates need to bomb now :). I sent out my thank you letters last night, so cross your fingers. I will continue to send out resumes just in case.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Who did I have coffee with?

Guess what I did today? Give up? I went and met Diana and Natalia for some coffee. I love these ladies. You all should be green with envy :P. Now, if all of you move to Florida we can all go have coffee. I hope we get to do it again soon.

As for my interview yesterday, I apparently passed because I have a face to face on Thursday! I'm definitely nervous because not only will I be meeting with the Director that I talked to yesterday but also the Manager and two of the programmers. The recruiter has already called my references so I think that might be a good sign and she told me that he (the director) had told her that he is glad he didn't overlook my resume. I'm thinking that this is a good sign.

Here is an excerpt from my monthly horoscope...keep in mind my face-to-face interview is on the 22nd.
Your first sign that something good is about to happen will be on the monumental meeting of the Sun and Jupiter, an annual event that I call the "luckiest day of the year." These two will meet in your home sector over the two days, January 23-24. Put a star on both!

You can also expect to see luck with your career at about the same time that the Sun and Jupiter meet over January 23-24.

Your very best career day of the month - and possibly of the New Year - will be Friday, January 23, but you will also feel excitement one day before on Thursday, January 22.

Then, while having coffee with Diana and Natalia, a corporate recruiter from one of the companies that I had sent a resume to called. I am still waiting to hear back from him. Things might be looking up!!!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Funk, no more!

Ok, funk is over. It has no choice, it must move on. Life is too short and can't waste the pretty :).

I have a phone interview this morning that I am feeling really good about. It's odd in a way. I'm not feeling good necessarily about the interview, but the job. The job has been posted since November so they have had a hard time filling it. I have my theories why but not ready to divulge that yet...I don't want to jinx anything. Do you all believe in fate? I do. I believe things happen for a reason. This job is at a hospital and this hospital is the one my step father has been frequenting, 5 miles from my parent's house. Now, my parents live 55 miles away. Yes, it will be a very long drive for me if I get the job but it probably won't take any longer than when I was driving 23 miles because I won't be driving with the traffic. The secret about this job is it will get my valuable experience in the medical field and I could go anywhere. My marketability will triple, if not more. This is a good thing! My mom is all excited. She thinks if I get the job that I will move closer to them, who knows.

As for A (6pack), he is occasionally talking to me when I ignore him. It's funny how that works. When he no longer gets any sort of attention from me and others are paying attention to me, he comes around a little bit more. It has taken me a bit and I am not totally there yet but if this is what he is going to do, then he doesn't deserve me. He will realize what he threw away when this other woman gets bored with him and I'm not there to pick up the pieces. Last night, he told me that I am way too nice sometimes. Yes, he's right. I told him that obviously being nice hasn't gotten me very far in many aspects of my life. He didn't respond and that's ok. I want someone to appreciate me while I am there, not after I am gone and at one time he did. So, moving on. I don't need his issues.

I want to thank all of you that have left your comments about asshat, it has helped.

The other good news in my life is that I am down a couple more pounds and I am back to the gym today. It's time, again to concentrate on me. This has always been my problem. I spend all my time thinking about everyone else and I forget about numero uno. One of these days, I will figure it out how to make it all about me.

The new me is gradually emerging and pushing the funk out of the way. After my interview today, I will be coming to visit you guys to see what you all have been up to as I have been neglecting all of you lately (nothing personal) . I am missing all of you wonderful ladies.

Monday, January 12, 2009

In a funk..

Well, I haven't been around because I am in a funk. The last thing I typed here was about having an interview. I had it and think I bombed on it in a few areas. I should hear something this week about it either way. They have a long hiring process so it could take several weeks anyway. Quite frankly, after talking to her it's not a job I would want forever but right now just need a paycheck. I did get some good news over the weekend that my mortage payment is going down about $100 a month and they sent me a check for my escrow analysis. It couldn't have come at a better time, it buys me a couple more months of time, if need be. If it would have come before I got laid off I would have spent it remodeling. So, the news in my life is I am still unemployed and...

I think A and I are done before it even started. For the past several weeks, he hasn't said much to me. He is going through a lot personally and he suffers from major bi-polar, not a good mixture. I have given him his space because I know he just shuts down to deal with things and will not talk to anyone. However, it has been several weeks and quite frankly I didn't know where I stood anymore. I had suspicions he was talking to some other chic in the game we play, which isn't a big deal normally but if you aren't spending the hours talking to me anymore and you are with someone else, I begin to wonder. This "chic" also knew that him and I had something going on and that I was crazy about him but she tried slithering her way in anyway. So anyway, I did talk to him yesterday and his first response to me was why do I need to make this about me. Um, because I am going through a lot too and would like you to be there asshole! He told me he is in shut down mode because of everything going on in his life and doesn't feel like talking to anyone. But yet, him and this chic were talking all night in game last night and logged off together. How can someone go from telling me they are crazy about me to spending hours with someone else almost over night? I don't get it. I'm sure he will be back in normal form but not sure I will be here. Men suck.

Monday, January 5, 2009

5.4 Gone...yay!

Just a quick note....

Good news, I am down 5.4 lbs this week. Yay, me! I am back to 269.4 and I think I can attribute that to my diet being 90% fruits and veggies this week.

My back is still bothering me a little bit but I'm going to attempt to go back to my Cardio Salsa class tonight to get back into the groove of my exercise.

I have a phone interview tomorrow. Wish me luck! I haven't interviewed in 11 years so am quite nervous but I bought a couple of interview books and have been all over the net trying to prepare for it so hopefully I won't choke!!!

Hope everyone had a happy new year.